Foster Care Placement... Week #1

Well; tomorrow will be one week since our first foster care placement. We will call her MJ even though that is not her name ;)
The first day I was a nervous WRECK. My insides churned, I shook like a leaf for about 24 hours. I woke up 10-15 times during the night thinking, "Oh gosh, I'm going to leave for work and forget that I have a child to take to school"
Thursday was new-school enrollment day. SHE was nervous that day. But she did GREAT... was ready to get home and do her homework after school. She is an AMAZINGLY sweet young girl. Very quiet, but smiles ear-to-ear constantly.
I went to work regularly Thursday and my nerves calmed down a little when I realized that not a WHOLE lot had changed. I still had my job to go to that I love, I still had my husband, I still had the Grace & Peace of God which made all the difference in the world... we just happen to be in charge on an 11-year-old princess!!
Thursday's Valentines Day card from Art Club at school looked like this:

Our church family has been OVERWHELMINGLY tremendously fabulous to us. Thursday night we got a visit from the Hallman's; they brought about 2,312 pieces of much-needed clothing and also assisted with Math homework! When I asked MJ about her homework she said, "I'm going to wait for Kevin to get home to help me with math." I said "Good idea! I'm terrible at Math"..... her response, "What subject ARE you good at?" HA! I could not help but laugh!!!! We ate dinner at Mt. Fugi after our visit and homework. She loved it and even tried Sushi; which she also loved. She enjoys school, homework, reading, going to church, eats well, smiles big and is just such a sweet-spirited young lady. God truly blessed us when He placed her into our home.

So--some things I've just got to share that has humbled me (things we take for granted)
*Lasagna (she'd never even heard of it)
*Vacation (never been on one)
*Electronic Tablets
*A pair of name brand shoes & a backpack
*A hand-stitched bookmark from my mother. This one broke the mold.... I thought she was going to cry she loved it so much
*A Bible and Bible cover (never had one)
*A bed to sleep in (had been sleeping on the floor or sharing a bed with 2 other children)

We had a 48-hour visit on Friday afternoon where the DHR worker commended us that we were doing great and she interviewed MJ and she told her she loved it with us. We are pretty fond of her too. Keep us in your prayers as she will have a visit this week with Mom.

Beginnings of our Foster Care Journey

I have not posted in a VERY long time.... looks like 2011 was the last post! Lots of things have changed in our lives.... well; I say that; no--they really haven't ha! BUT--I don't craft nearly as much; we have simplified our home and "stuff" tremendously so I believe I can successfully say I've moved on from the "Wanna-Be Crafter/Photographer/Organizer" to a new point in life. I will warn you; this is a very honest look into my thoughts and feelings as we have begun this new chapter of my life. Some thoughts and feelings that I am not proud of; but that I know God has worked through.

With that being said.....We have become a certified Foster Home! I wanted to re-direct this blog; mainly just for my own record. I want to keep up with thoughts, experiences, etc. as we go through our process.... and I can type a whole lot quicker than I can write. So; here we go....


I can look back now and see where our journey into the Foster care system began. My husband, Kevin was in college for a degree in Psychology with a focus in Christian Counseling. I can't remember exactly how; but he got into DHR (Department of Human Resources--similar to many state Child Protective Services) to intern and fell.in.love. CRAZY right? Yes... that's what we said then; and what we continue to say confidently now!
Since I was a young-20-something; I've been afraid of having a baby. Like seriously; terrified. I was gripped with fear and anxiety on a daily basis; and just knew that I would never be able to take care of an infant because all I could do was worry. We were married in March of 2008 and as the years went by my feelings and decisions were always contingent on something else happening. I thought; maybe when I get a better job I will feel ready.... well I got a promotion; still didn't want to have a baby. Then I said, "Maybe after I finish my Master's degree I will feel ready.... completed that in 2014; still didn't want to have a baby. I know it's seriously ridiculous; like seriously who does NOT want to have a baby? Well.... me I guess.
My husband has supported me through the process; we have been active with our churches youth group (he is a co-leader and LOVES what he does). I teach a children's class on Wednesday evenings and share in my rounds of children's church. I seriously love kids.... I work with them everyday in my day-job as well.... but a baby of my own just terrifies me.

Whether it be by Satan's hand [originally] when fear gripped me; or by God's miraculous intervention in my thought process and my life overall--we decided to begin GPS classes at our County DHR facility. We toyed with the decision for about 2 years before we finally agreed that "Yes--this is what God wants for us; this is what we need to do". Isn't it amazing how when God has something in store for you He will not.let.it.go? We were involved in a ministry this summer called Epiphany; where we go into a secured lock-up facility for boys ages 12-15. You know how you say "I went to bless others but got so much more of a blessing myself"? Yep--that's what happened. God used this 3-day weekend to show Kevin and I that we COULD love children who were not our own. We wanted to take every single one of them home and raise them to successful adulthood!

So begins the official Foster care process. I would say after approximately Class #3 and 423,329 pieces of paperwork we'd filled out--"the discussion" happened. I told Kevin I really just didn't think that Fostering was for us. Kevin talked me into completing the classes with assurance that "if we finished and still didn't want to continue--there was no obligation to do so" So--7 classes later, 3 home inspection/visits, 192,428 MORE pieces of paperwork later and an additional month of dragging our feet around finishing up requirements we finally became a certified home. Because of the terror of babies; we said we would take 5 year olds or above. I will just tell you--that's EXACTLY what DHR wants to hear; because devastatingly enough; it's very rare that folks want "the older ones". Lots of folks take DHR classes to become certified; really only having the intention of adopting. Which honestly, was our first goal. However, as we continued through classes; we felt the tug of God's hand leading us toward Fostering.

Let's say 'Certified Home Status' came on Monday morning at 9:00 am.... we had been called the Friday before; "two-14 year old boys...once you get certified; would you be willing to take them in?" Again....terror! "No... I don't think that will quite fit our family" All while I was secretly hoping for some reason we may not become "certified"!

Monday morning at 10:15--Are you sure you can't take these two? "No..."
Thursday at 10:00 am--How about four children? They are all siblings & can't be separated. "What!! No way! We don't even have room for TWO right now!!!!!!!!!"--Honestly; still thinking "maybe we will just never get the "right"match.
Next Tuesday at 2:00 pm--Okay--what about a 17-year old homeless boy that the shelter cannot keep?  Kevin wanted so badly to say yes... when all I could think about was safety. I.was.scared. This was a very difficult decision for us, I said mean things that I didn't mean; Kevin said mean things; it was not a good night.

Wednesday advice from a Foster friend from class that have received children.... "They will try to push you around because you don't have your own children... you know what's best for your family. Stick your ground." WHEW if that wasn't a calling straight from God; as I had felt hopelessly defeated and selfish for turning down our home.

Thursday--"we have a young girl needing placement. 11 years old." Honestly; the peace that God filled both mine and Kevin's heart with at that moment surpassed all understanding. The night before the call I had told my sweet Mother, "I just feel that if it is supposed to be, and it is the right fit for our family...we will BOTH feel at peace". Well--God worked that one out too! He provided when I didn't think I could possibly ever have peace. They told us the worker needed to wait until Tuesday (TODAY!!!!) because of some doctors appointments and court trials before she could move her to us.

All that to say............... God Willing; we receive Placement #1 today. I am excited; thrilled; scared; terrified; worried; joyful; devastated for her situation; feeling incompetent and incapable but mostly just blessed.
Blessed that God has given us the ability to temporarily care for and love a child who we did not "create". Really; just all-around..... Blessed.

So; here we go.............................................................